18 - 30 Month Plus Group

Thanks marj. It could happen at any time for you. Keep the faith. 

Hi everyone,

 

I NEVER EVER thought I would still be here.  I jumped about 20 months ago!

 

I have had some real good days, not just days but weeks and even months.  I thought I was getting past all this and was even ready to write my success post.  But then all of a sudden I got hit hard.. and probably one  of the hardest hits I'm getting.

 

Many of my acute symptoms have faded, however, I got hit very hard with dizzy/floating feeling that last most of the day.  Nights are better but its' still there. 

 

It's just so disheartening as I was feeling real good.  Working out and doing lots of yoga.  I'm wondering if the yoga might have contributed to how Im feeling now.  I have notice there were a couple of times in the past after a month of yoga I would get dizzy/floaty.

 

Anyhow, I can't believe I'm 20 months out and still dealing with this crap!!!

 

Sorry for the rant.

Matt

Siggy and Cindys,

 

I'm absolutely delighted to hear about the healing steps you've taken. You cheer us all on by sharing your progress.

 

Sofa, Marj and Matt,

 

I know you're getting slammed and it's hard to keep believing. The symptoms are hard to tolerate and we're all so tired of them going on so long. I hope you see some bits of relief very soon. You *can* make it through. Don't believe the voices in your head that say otherwise. Trust those who have gone before us.

 

I'm driving 6 or so hours to Atlanta to visit a friend tomorrow. I'm looking forward to the visit but not so much the drive in my state of exhaustion and sleep deprivation. I have good books on CD and am hoping for an uneventful drive.

 

You all take care of each other!

 

MT

Siggy-great news.  Glad you're out of the swamp.

 

Cindy-I'm right behind you as always.

 

I'm decent all things considered.  Getting back into the swing of things after vacation and the time change from NZ.  I went to work yesterday but I stupidly decided to cut my propranolol on Sunday. Even though I'm only on a small dose it gave me major racing heart, foggy head, and headache. I came home early but feel way better today.  I only have to small doses to cut so will do on a long weekend.

I'm feeling so much better and am clear as a bell most days. If I feel bad it's for a few hours at most. I figure this is my year of rebuilding my life in year 3-4.  It does get better and I'm even looking forward to way more improvement. 

Drew, Cindy, and Siggy- yay!!!!

 

So excited for you all!

I am waving like crazy really hope this is it for me...

This wave is kicking my butt! I think it's been going now 2+ months?

39 months May 1st / OMG!

***I CT so please don't anyone be scared by the 39***

I have been feeling extremely high lately and no I am not smoking anything!

My I can't breathe crap is back along with the throats spasms ect...

It feels unreal... And brain zaps, I almost forgot about them all together...

Drew, I think I'm stuck on that damn wheel of misfortune! 

This clearing of the throat crud is doing me in!

And the coughing crap up or chocking it up...

Trying to accept this is withdrawal this far out is getting harder..

My health anxieties are kicking in!

Sorry for the vent guys!

Matt,Sofa and Marj, keep fighting ❤️️

MTfan, safe travels.

 

Jen it's just a few more spins until you bankrupt the benzo beast.

 

I did want to add one more thing..it seems as of now I no longer get panics.its like my body can't get to the point of adrenaline surges and all the yuck.  That's the only way I can describe it. When I'm anxious now it's a different type of anxious that I'm not used to. Not terrible and panicky like my whole life from high school on.  That's pretty incredible since that's what I went on the drugs for over 25 years ago.

 

Okay...don't want to jinx this anymore than I already have.

Oh Drew, so excited to get to that!

It sounds amazing 😉

WOW, Words cannot explain how stoked i am read the last 2 pages! Just so happens ive picked up again today as well,  even did some exercise which snapped me out of the cogfog ive had for the last week. Maybe all this good healing is rubbing off on me halfway round the globe 

 

 

Well wouldn't you know it.. I have a month of hell, post here yesterday and today is the best I've felt in the last month.

 

But I'm very tentative and even scared to go out for a walk thinking at any moment I'm gonna get slammed with the dizziness. 

 

 

Thanks all for the support.

 

M

 

 

I agree with you Jen, I can't wait to get to the other side and I'm sorry you are still getting this, so unfair.

 

It's really good to hear Drew, I'm amazed you've been to NZ again. Glad you've picked up too Lockie. And Matt, such a relief for you. I know not everyone gets windows and it's really common not to, but seriously, if I had a whole day of feeling normal it would give me some hope. Today isn't as bad as yesterday, but my head is so heavy and tight as is my neck and face; it's so scary, it may be lack of sleep. I know it would not take much to set me off. Being fighting of the thoughts today of this is just me. But I know it's not, they keep popping in there though. Was telling someone today, all the stuff I used to do, I would put my hand to anything being so independent, I even used a pneumatic drill once to dig up a patio,  and now...... it's just a struggle.

 

Thanks for the encouragement MT and good luck with your trip, you'r e braver than me right now.

 

Anyone else, I wish for this to disappear and for happiness and fulfilment.

 

I totally get the "things I used to do" thing...  I was out with family the other week and my niece and a friend of hers wanted to go out and race each other.  A few years ago, I would have been running right along side of them, but the thought of trying to exert that energy just made me so exhausted so I just had to watch 

 

Glad you're feeling at least a little better today as opposed to yesterday.  That's how it started for me before I started to get days and eventually weeks of windows. 

 

I agree with you Jen, I can't wait to get to the other side and I'm sorry you are still getting this, so unfair.

 

It's really good to hear Drew, I'm amazed you've been to NZ again. Glad you've picked up too Lockie. And Matt, such a relief for you. I know not everyone gets windows and it's really common not to, but seriously, if I had a whole day of feeling normal it would give me some hope. Today isn't as bad as yesterday, but my head is so heavy and tight as is my neck and face; it's so scary, it may be lack of sleep. I know it would not take much to set me off. Being fighting of the thoughts today of this is just me. But I know it's not, they keep popping in there though. Was telling someone today, all the stuff I used to do, I would put my hand to anything being so independent, I even used a pneumatic drill once to dig up a patio,  and now...... it's just a struggle.

 

Thanks for the encouragement MT and good luck with your trip, you'r e braver than me right now.

 

Anyone else, I wish for this to disappear and for happiness and fulfilment.

 

Jen it's just a few more spins until you bankrupt the benzo beast.

 

I did want to add one more thing..it seems as of now I no longer get panics.its like my body can't get to the point of adrenaline surges and all the yuck.  That's the only way I can describe it. When I'm anxious now it's a different type of anxious that I'm not used to. Not terrible and panicky like my whole life from high school on.  That's pretty incredible since that's what I went on the drugs for over 25 years ago.

 

Okay...don't want to jinx this anymore than I already have.

 

I know this feeling, I think, it's like turning the ignition but the engine doesn't quite turn over.

I made a little trip to Berkeley for some time off this week and am feeling better than I have in over a year! 

 

I seriously don't know how we get through all of this, but somehow, someway, we do. I have so much admiration and respect for anyone who has walked this journey. Full healing will come for all of us eventually!

 

Wishing everyone my best 

Hi friends. Crummy day over here. Has anyone here had to take an antibiotic? I would never take a fluoroquinolone, of course.

 

Has anyone taken one? If so, which one and how did it make you feel? Thank you

Kiddo,

 

Cooperten took some courses of antibiotics throughout her journey and she seems very knowledgeable about them.  She posted her reactions (or lack of) to them on the 6-12, 12-18, 18-30 month ongoing threads.  Rather than comb through all the threads, it might be faster to PM her.

 

We are all so different and each of us gets different reactions to the same drugs.  I know Coop recently had luck with tetracycline, I believe.  Some people are fine with amoxicillin.  I have searched "antibiotics" on the forum and came up with all kinds of different antibiotics suggestions and experiences.

 

I wish you luck in finding the most benign antibiotic with no adverse reaction whatsoever.  It's out there.

 

Sofa

Thanks Sofa. I've done the "search" too....it's overwhelming....and as you said, everyone reacts differently. I think I'm just going to put the surgery off - likely not the smartest thing to do but I'm just done with it all at the moment. They want to use 4g of Ancef per-surgery. Ugh  :'(

Drew,

 

Way to go, buddy!  It's happening for you.  You fought long and hard.  You beat the beast.  It doesn't matter if it's not perfect, yet.  You know when you've turned the big corner.  That's what's important.  The horror is behind you.  Just clean up work left.

 

Love, Sofa

Oh Kiddo,

 

I know how scared you are about taking meds that may rile the benzo beast, but you need to take care of yourself.  Not everyone falls down a rabbit hole with meds for surgery.  Have you searched the word "surgery" on the forum?  Have you considered starting a surgery safe meds thread in the Protracted Board where the seasoned pros can weigh in?  People who KNOW the difference between regular withdrawal and a reaction to a drug for surgery.  Claudia (Morreweg) recently had surgery.  There are so many others I have read about, I just can't remember them all now.

 

Edit:  I just googled Ancef, thinking it was a sedation drug you were also worried about and, duh, it's an antibiotic, the topic you originally brought up.  Sorry.  I have never heard of that drug, but it said it's in the same "family" as Keflex, which some people have had no problem with.  I'm sure you've researched the heck out of it yourself.

 

Love, Sofa

Kiddo,

 

I have had a couple surgeries during my acute and post-withdrawal phases of my journey, all with success. With them, I have had to take a single dose of "presurgery" antibiotics, and I've had no issues with them (I don't remember what they were, but I remember researching them here and making certain they weren't in the 'fluroquin' family). I used propofol for sedation each time, and had zero uptick in symptoms as a result. It seems that lots of buddies have tolerated it (propofol) well here, which is why I chose it. Of course, everyone is unique, so you'd need to make that decision for yourself:)

 

I think you're pretty safe taking a single-dose antibiotic presurgery, IMO. I also asked the anesthesiologist what medications he was planning to use on me, and he & I reviewed the list together pre-surgery and again on the day of surgery -- just to be sure we were on the same page. In the list he had a pain medicine that was a narcotic, and I requested it's removal (my surgery wasn't expected to be a "high-pain" situation post-op, so I felt it was ok in my particular case to forego pain meds) and he removed it. Also on my list was lidocaine with epinephrine, and I requested it without epinephrine, and he obliged. Originally, I was also to receive a benzo pre- and post-op for my "comfort", which I also opted out of. All in all, surgical procedures have proven very successful for me during my withdrawal, so long as I am informed and involved in the process. I believe you will be just peachy also You are smart, informed, and prepared -- and can face any situation you need to, IMO If you decide to move ahead with surgery, I believe you will be just fine friend

 

Holler back if ya need anything

 

Mrs.

 

PS: it's 2:55am here and I've been awake since 1:45am with tummy "grievances"  I think I am finally nearing the, ahem, "cleansed out" phase of this, and maybe starting to feel better (hopeful prayers!!). Hope y'all are doing ok!!

 

**A quick modification to mention that both Coop and I have recently used doxycycline to treat different situations, and both of us had no ill effects from it. Not sure if it would replace ancef or not (meaning I'm not sure if it treats the same types of things that ancef does), but it never hurts to ask the question I also recognize that we are all unique, and that just because something worked for one person doesn't mean it works for everyone -- feel free to do as you see fit, Kiddo I am just trying to dispel some of the common benzo fears of medications and medical procedures:)

Hi friends. Crummy day over here. Has anyone here had to take an antibiotic? I would never take a fluoroquinolone, of course.

 

Has anyone taken one? If so, which one and how did it make you feel? Thank you

 

I took a two week course of amoxycillin after a root canal. I was in full blown w/d and hadn't slept in two days. Zero downside for me taking it. But yeah, I'd never take a fluoroquinolone again either.

Hi everyone. Hope your healing is continuing!

 

Just a quick check in for me. All over the place this last week since i came out of the last wave. Had a mild exercise session wednesday and snapped me out of the cogfog i have been dealing with and into a window,  i actually felt that energy and x factor like my body was in the zone for the first time in years but didnt push my limit. I was a bit shaky after for half hour then into a window!

 

This lasted till midday yesterday then totally slammed with nasty cottonbrains , anxiety and headache and was expecting another week of torture but about 5pm like someone flicked a switch BOOM 95% window!! 

 

Woke up at baseline today not too bad so going to push another mild workout session too see what happens.

 

My body feels like motor that needs a serious tune........ coughing and spluttering on startup but if you keep kicking it over enough eventually it will start. Only then can the real tuning process begin. (Sorry im a total revhead lol)

 

Keep it real buddies 

I'm not going to go on about how rubbish I've been but I have a new symptom where my stomach is burning and aid reflux. Although I have worse stuff going on, how can this be?

 

Glad you're doing better Lockie. I cried like a banshee in the shower this morning  :'( sleeping better but still so exhausted and miserable. Trying not to be though, I wear a mask all day at work.

I haven't been this bad since my big wave around 18months...

So scared, confused!

 

Keep on truckin' Lockie.

 

Marj and Jen, I'm sorry you're both still having a rough time. Wish I could do something to make it better.

Hi Marj and Mrs , so sorry you are having a rough time. Please keep ur chin up! There is evidence all around you of healing on this thread ot will happen for you too.

 

Keep strong buddies , im cheering for you!!