When you’re at your Witt’s end….

What has worked for you?

This is a nightmare. And I just cannot continue:

* Thinking about it All.The.Time.

* Diaphragmatic breathing; 4-7-8 breathing-ANY breathing exercises,

* Changing my mindset, because there is NO changing it-this is hell,

* Acceptance, Radical Acceptance. I do not accept this as my life. I don’t. I accept this is what’s happening-for now-yet, as my life. Errrr…. does this make sense?

* Patience. It’s reached it’s limit. I’m out.

* Scanning: ‘Oh dear, the chocolate ice cream has caffeine, per Dr. Google, when will my heart calm down?’, ‘My lymph node is swollen! Oh dear, the WD causes my immune system to stop working, it must be Covid-even though I HAVENT LEFT MY HOUSE FOR A MONTH!’; I am sweating-every 68 minutes, it’s never going to end’-ad infinum,

* I’m so alone, nobody understands, there’s nobody to help/save me 🙇‍♀️,

* Everyone is living, everyone I know is happy, thriving. There must be something fundamentally wrong with me as my misery just gets worse. Daily. Now? Unlike 2 weeks ago? Hourly.

* Oh no… it’s almost time to get in bed. Hang on, Buttercup as you know by 1 a.m. your going to wake up sweating and, wait? Is it an anxiety attack? No, gurl, it’s going to be a full blown panic attack by 3 a.m. Have your phone at the ready for a guided meditation-AGAIN!

* You Got This. No, I don’t. I’m exhausted. Remember, ‘Do not have fear of Fear’. Right-FEAR is FEAR and it’s debilitating.

* ‘For the love of all mankind, is tomorrow going to be worse?’. I won’t sleep. I’ll just….

So. Yes. I’m completely, totally at my Witt’s end. And the above is just a fraction.

How do any of you move through this? How do you find the stamina? The tenacity? The courage?! 🙏

I feel as though most of those who have a bad WD or CT go through this ;_; it feels never ending, painful, scary and traumatic. One thing after another after another, and with no end in sight. That’s how it feels at least. Eventually, it starts to improve. Little by little, those obsessions and thoughts get quieter, and before you know it, you have the energy to function again. Some days are harder than others, but it does get better :3

 

I probably felt like I wasn’t going to make it hundreds of times. I never imagined being in my current state. I thought I was damaged, sick. But alas! I was not lol It was just my wee nerves, trying to function on their own and having a real rough time ;_;

Thank you ThisBur! How long, for you, until you passed through this terrifying stage?

With tolerance, CT and readjustment, it all took a year. That’s everything though. Adjusting to reinstatement took about 2 months and then life was looking up :3

Yeah it can take a while but you are using some good coping techniques already, I'd also suggest tapping, and some very gentle exercise, and try to leave the house for maybe just a few minutes at a time as much as you can, cause distraction is key in this.