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Valium Isn’t Taking Any More of My Life


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    I was put on Valium for muscle spasms, a low dose, after a surgical injury. Terrible recovery, took 1.5 year-ish. Then, I was like ok I’ll stop my meds. Had no idea what lay ahead for me. Figured out it was the benzo withdrawal, so I thought I would taper for a few weeks and be ok. No- I had to taper for a full year. Then I thought withdrawal wouldn’t be too bad. No. It was. Complete torture. I’m a mom, bunch of young kids. I’ve missed SO much of their lives and their childhood. I cannot believe this stuff is given to people every day. I did everything “right” with tapering and recovery. It has taken 34-ish months, and I can say the worst is over. After the two year mark, I started improving quickly. Before that, I hadn’t seen any progress. It was soul crushing. My husband stuck it out with me, my parents, sister, children- all waited for me to improve. It took 2.5 years to feel hopeful. Now, I can say that I believe everyone heals because I’m living it. It took FOREVER.

  My head doesn’t hurt every single day. I don’t throw up all of the time, I don’t have neuropathy in my feet, my body doesn’t burn, my gums don’t hurt, I don’t have pelvic pain, I don’t have back spasms, I don’t have muscle spasms all of the time, I don’t have morning panic.

 

Now- I had a wave a couple of weeks ago! Word to the wise- do NOT try a probiotic that is for “Mood Booster.” I got it off Amazon, and it promised to work in the gut to help me make neurotransmitters. Y’all- I had two weeks of acute while I was taking it before I figured it out!! I stopped the probiotics, and it stopped the next day.

 

I don’t drink anymore, but I have had a couple of drinks in the last year on special occasions. I was ok.

 

Occasionally I’ll be a little overstimulated by lots of voices, sounds, and lights in a crowd but I can manage it. I’d say I’m 95% healed. I have always gotten migraines, and when they hit I can feel if benzo withdrawal is making it worse- the pressure feeling. I’d say maybe 3-4 times in the last 4 months I’ve felt head pressure. But it passed quickly.

 

I wanted my life back, and I’ve got it. Everything from now on will just be icing on the cake. I want to build muscle back. I want to go do things and make up for lost time. I’m closing this chapter of my life and looking forward, without fear of a wave. Small twinges here or there on a bad day might happen, but real “waves” where I can’t leave the house- those are over! I can actually commit to things in advance.

 

Just keep going! One foot in front of the other. I was SO sick. I was awful at one year out. Two years out! And then, healing started when I wasn’t expecting it. It is the best feeling in the world to know that I made it, I triumphed over this poison. You can too!

 

God bless, and good luck.

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St Teresa, I needed a new success story today.  Thank you for taking the time to post yours.  While it took you a long time, it is still encouraging.
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StTeresaA,

 

What you posted will give hope to those still in the throes of benzo withdrawal, thank you for this.

 

I'm sorry that a medical issue led you to being put on valium, but you persevered with a wonderful support system, and now you can enjoy your life of wellness.

 

pianogirl  :smitten:

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I just love your attitude and the title of your story!  Deciding not to let benzos take any more from us is a greaat way to look at it and that is sort of what I did as well.  I wish you well as you continue to proceed in your recovery and in your newly reclaimed life!!
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My story is very similar to yours in that I was given Valium for muscle tension and headaches after I fell forward from my bed onto a night table.  I should have just been advised to take Tylenol for the headaches and have some neck and shoulder massages; however, long story short, I was off and on the Valium for a period of 14 months, long enough to cause me to get so constipated that my bowels became impacted and I had to have a colostomy.  Actually, I recovered well from the surgery, but six months later I had the colostomy reversed, and was given Versed, which is a benzo and I went downhill pretty quickly.  After finding a young benzo savvy neurologist he informed me that the Valium was causing the headaches!!!! I am now at 23 months tomorrow and having some nice windows…just had one for a month, but because I always overdo when in a window, I have been in a wave for about five days.  My waves are getting shorter so that is a blessing.

 

I wish you all good things in life, as you have certainly earned it!

 

GG

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Wow how refreshing to see someone new recover! I loved this! I wish you continued enjoyment of your new healed life. Make you go on to make beautiful symptom free memories with your children and family.

 

:smitten:

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Thank you for taking the time to write this for all of us. I am most encouraged to hear your healing happened after a long road because even though I am creeping up on a year, I am not well and stories where people were also not well and then healed rapidly gets me through the days when I start thinking this is permanent.

 

I am happy for you!  :smitten:

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Thank you for giving us hope! This journey is like being in a thick forest where you just can’t see a way out, but the people who got out to the clearing and can see the sun again can try to describe how it is over there. That way we get some hope that maybe, just maybe, one way we get to the clearing as well.

 

Did you experience one last major wave before the healing started to happen more quickly?

 

Enjoy your rebirth and all the best to you.

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 3 months later...

  Another update- no more head pressure, ever. If I have a migraine, it’s like my normal hormonal ones. No weird muscle spasms. Foot vibrations are gone. I’d say 99% healed. Might be 100% but it’s hard to say. Keep going you guys!!

 

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Thank you for your story and your update! I love hearing this. I had constant migraines on the meds and mine are pretty much gone at 1 year post jump.  But the inner tingling and vibrating and semi nausea come and go willy nilly. After spending a night of my feet vibrating and other nuisance symptoms, it's GREAT to read that your vibrations are gone!  Many thanks for the encouraging posts.  Congrats to you! :thumbsup:
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  • 3 weeks later...

Wow! So awesome that the rest of the annoying symptoms left. What a warrior you are! I’m so happy for you. I’m coming up right behind you as I’m getting better too. Wishing you much love as you go on symptoms free making beautiful memories with your kids and family. Hank you for the update.

 

:smitten:

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  • 3 months later...

I just saw your success story and your update.Encouraging me so much. I'm barely hanging on at 29 months and one week. I sure hope I can follow in your footsteps and start seeing better days. Thank you! Hugs!!!

LiveLife

 

 

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