Life just got so surreal

Hello All,

Just switched from .5 Klonopin to 8mg valium. My head feels so surreal in a bad way. Very very dizzy. Spinning around and around. Not sure what to do. Trying to distract. Very hard when you aren't walking, or speaking well.  My husband tries to talk me down but I can barely follow what he is saying. Then I blanked out for a minute completely. What the hell? I mean eyes closed, I knew he was talking but I have no idea what about. He clapped his hands and I woke out of it. Still feel really weird. Nauseous as all get out. Cant get comfortable, constantly checking my pulse oximeter, and thermometer.  I had a therapy session , thought it went well. She was happy with my  progress. Since then, I feel really bad.  feel like I am about to pass out. I cant think straight.I'm sure this is normal, anyone? I usually laugh my way out of it, not today.-K Especially the blank out. Oh and crying fits??

Benzo equivalency charts can never be perfect and they don't account for the fact that you got very used to the drug you converted from. I see 0.5mg clonazepam expressed as roughly 10mg diazepam. So you're effectively taking a fairly large cut in equivalent dose and also having to get used to replacing clonazepam with diazepam. If you crossed over to (say) 20mg diazepam, the increase in equivalent benzo dose is substantial enough to mitigate the fact that the drug you are dependant on is being replaced with something different.

If you only just crossed over (as in, days ago) then you might want to reconsider 8mg being the right dose to swap to. Try 10mg instead. I wouldn't view this as a backwards step; 0.5mg clonazepam -> 8mg diazepam was ambitious and probably overly optimistic in most cases. From the description of your symptoms, I think this might still be uncomfortable but should be significantly more manageable than what you're going through right now.

My own experience with severe symptoms after withdrawing too quickly, and reading others too, is that when it gets really bad it takes at least a month to see solid improvement. It's horrible to go through and by my estimation is unhealthy and counterproductive. In other words, avoid it if you can. You could spend several weeks sticking at 8mg, feeling really dreadful before improving. In the same time, you could stabilise on a more sensible dose and make a couple of reductions without feeling anywhere near as terrible as if you held at 8mg and perhaps even reduce the amount of time spent on benzos in the long run, but certainly not drastically increasing it.

What you're going through is not alarming as in it's to be expected for somebody in your shoes and while it feels dangerous on some level, it really probably isn't. That said, it is neither something that has to be a necessary part of withdrawal for most people, nor is it better than managing your taper so that you don't get that bad.

You will be alright and you will pull around eventually. You can stay at this 8mg and expected to feel gradually better over the course of 1-2 months feeling profoundly unwell for most of that, especially the next few weeks. Or, you can tell the doctor that this is more than you can handle and that you need a higher dose of diazepam first in order to stabilise. I think the latter option is better, if indeed it is an option for you.

What you are feeling is really common, whether is be ceros-over, tapering, or jumping. your body is trying to adjust. Being zoned out, light-headed, and the crying - omg the crying (for me...). Anything you feel right now is completely possible and normal.

In the beginning I was told this was a marathon and not a sprint - and they are right. It truly is a very non-linear healing process and you will learn to live day by day. You cannot predict how you will feel day to day - or even hour to hour sometimes. I've seen myself have crushing depression half the day only to have it lift by dinnertime. so weird.

Others have healed and so can you.